Sunday, April 24, 2011

Easter Reflections

Budmeister
To no longer be awakened at the crack of dawn on Easter morning by two exuberant little children is both a good thing and a bad thing.  It is a good thing because the Easter Bunny is not quite ready, and it is a bad thing because it feels like all that tradition and fun is gone by.

We even forgot to dye eggs this year.  We do it every year on Holy Thursday.  I did eventually buy the eggs and dye, but the package has been sitting on the counter for two days without anyone mentioning it.

I suppose I could be sad about the loss of the expectancy and innocence, but I'm considering skipping that.  For every little thing that I notice has passed, there is something to be thankful for to take its place.  For example, getting enough sleep. Or having time to put the last minute touches (okay, start puttting together) the baskets.  If my children were still bounding in to wake me at their age and size, I think I would be worried.

I look at other people's babies and small children and I smile.  I tweak their toes and googoo at them.  I enjoy their existence without needing one of my own.  (I happen to feel that way about dogs too.)  While my younger friends are frantically looking for a sitter, I am enjoying my freedom to come and go.  I am counting down the days when my daughter has her license, so I can send her out for Mexican food.  I have paid my dues; I have enjoyed that innocent time.  Now it is time for the next phase.

Until grandchildren.
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Friday, April 22, 2011

Winning Spirit

My son's basketball team is quickly proving themselves to be the worst in the league. I say that with pride, because I tell my son that they surely have learned the most of any team these last few months. But I also agree with him that losing sucks.

It's not that we don't have a couple of talented players who hustle and score. But many have little experience, and they have never played as a team before. We have one tall player, my son, and with that height comes expectations. I watch him improving and getting more comfortable, but basically he's a nice kid with little experience.

At this game, the opposing team had four very tall players, one of whom was a man-boy who looked like he should be in high school and shaving instead of in fifth or sixth grade. The coach had obviously grilled these boys to be piranhas. They were mean and lean. And all their shorts matched.

While they were making score after score, and foul after foul, our boys were ducking and crawling to keep from being injured. Watching a thirteen-year-old pubescent shove backwards into a small ten-year-old boy made you want to go down on the court with a large handbag.

We had some bad juju going on too. Even our wiry guys were off today. If I had a nickel for every shot that traveled around the rim and flew out, I would have had enough for a large Gucci knockoff. It was a blessing the scoreboard was on the fritz today, because the score was something like GNP to zip.

Our team has played together enough to know who scores. The other players respect that hierarchy, and have dramatically improved their passing skills. My son gets the ball now and again, being tall, and has gotten good at passing. But just once, for him, I would like to see him go for a shot. Or at least have one of his teammates pass to him on purpose.

To my delight, one time when he had the ball and we were not yet on the board, he took that shot. The ball arced beautifully towards the hoop and licked the lips of the rim, but bad juju made it fly out again. Dang. I saw the word on his face.

Sometime in the second half, after the sympathetic referee froze the other team's score, we got on the board. My son even went for a second shot with similar results as the first. We scored a couple of times, with parents going ballistic with every shot. The parents on the other team were barely watching, chatting on cel phones and with each other.

Then something interesting happened. One of our players made a shot and the ball landed on top of the backboard and stuck fast. The referee called for another ball--not to keep playing, but to get the first ball down.

A couple of our teammates took a few shots to knock it down, but wires and poles kept it from contacting the ball. Even the referee tried a couple times. My son tried once, and kissed the ball, but it didn't budge. Still, I could see his mind working.

That look on his face is one I have seen a hundred times. We have nine mature trees in our front yard which have been home to errant remote control planes, kites, paper airplanes, sticks, ropes, hats, and even a pair of scissors once. Our homes also have some low elevation roof lines which have served the same purpose as the trees: to challenge a little boy looking upwards and wondering how he's going to get his boomerang down.

I could see that look on his face now. He had no step ladder, no grabber, no extending pole for changing light bulbs. He just had a basketball.

Finally, his outstretched hands received the ball from a teammate, and my son walked around to the side of the backboard. He cooly assessed the distance, aimed, and shot. The ball bounced off the other, which started to roll slowly along the backboard. In slow motion, the ball made its way to the other end and fell off to the ground.

The parents cheered as if the winning point were dunked. "Ten-pointer!" Even the other side put down their phones for a moment. A couple of my son's teammates congratulated him. But more beautiful than seeing that ball drop was the expression on my son's face as he loped off. There was his big smile with maybe a hint of embarrassment in the pink of his cheeks. But overall, there was the distinct look of pride.

Epilogue: The last game of the season was quite exciting, with a fingernail-biting spread of no more than two points the entire game. We were up by two when the buzzer sounded, and our team and the crowd went wild. Finally, to know what it feels like to win. Very cool.
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Friday, December 10, 2010

Christmas Card 2010

Cool Blue Holly Christmas Card
Create modern Christmas cards at Shutterfly.
View the entire collection of cards.
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Wednesday, September 1, 2010

Teaming Up for Fun

In a never-ending quest to team up and share our gifts with one another, my dear girlfriend Peg Windisch and I worked together to create an article about her non-profit organization, We Are Coaches. The organization is committed to "help empower children to grow the kind of wings that will serve them, and the world, in adulthood." The article appeared as the community non-profit spotlight in the August 2010 issue of Natural Awakenings magazine, a local San Diego publication. The article can be read here.
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Monday, January 25, 2010

Melt Me

So my ten-year-old guy says to me this morning as he's buttoning his shirt, "Mom, you make my life easier." Then he counts with his fingers, "You wash my clothes, you give me food, and you just love me." As we're hugging he says, "You just help me get through life."

Wherever you are, my future daughter-in-law, you're one lucky girl.
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Saturday, August 1, 2009

Right in the Kisser

My ten-year-old comes into the room and plunks on the bed. After a heavy sigh, he says, "My insides feel lonely."

I love the images this child brings up when he tries to express himself in words the best way he can. I immediately turn to him, trying to read the emotion in his face.

Again, he laments, "My heart feels empty." Oh, the saga of a sad little boy. I stand up to go to him, wanting to take him into my arms and hold him, filling up all those empty spaces with the totality of motherly love.

I lie down next to him, and start to draw him close to me. He pulls away and says, "The computer always makes me feel better. Can I go on it?"

R-i-i-i-p the gentle music.

After some wrestling and laughter, he is sent to finish up his chores before getting on the computer. I lie there thinking, "What have we come to?" I know I am not replaceable, but it still makes me want to take a fist to our technology.

"One of these days, Alice. Pow! Right in the kisser!"
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Friday, July 10, 2009

Leave the Light On

As he often does, my ten-year-old son asked that I leave his light on low as he climbed into bed. I told him I was tired and did not want to have to turn it off after he was asleep, but still I complied.

As he settled in, he mused, "I don't know what I am going to do when I am a grownup. I'll have to get a timer or something."
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